I’m not in the habit of doing movie reviews, here or anywhere else. Mainly because people like what they like, they have their own tastes which may or may not match mine, and de gustibus non disputandum est, a Latin maxim meaning “in matters of taste, there can be no disputes.” So my telling you that I liked something seems a waste of time and counterproductive.
Then, last night I watched The Parenting on HBO/Max, and I enjoyed it so much that (1) I had to tell someone, and (2) I realized that the farce of it was a needed relief from the hellish reality and uncertainty of “current events.” Somehow, this silly little comedy-horror film about a young, attractive, gay, interracial Gen Z couple renting a house for a weekend in upstate New York to meet each other’s parents for the first time made me “forget about life for a while,” to quote Billy Joel, and laugh more than I’ve laughed at anything onscreen for a very long time. I absolutely loved this movie! Oh, did I mention the house they rent is inhabited by a demon?
The parents-meeting-parents setup that opens the movie is reminiscent of the 2004 Ben Stiller sequel Meet the Fockers, but is decidedly fresh and modern. I almost hit pause at this stage to text a friend and say, “drop what you’re doing and watch this.” Josh and Rohan are boyfriends, but this is hardly an LGBTQ+ movie – their queerness, their interactions, their relationship is portrayed in the way you’d expect any young, heterosexual couple getting away for the weekend with their parents would be; in other words, their same-sex relationship is part of the story, but it doesn’t stand out. I think this is due in large part to the two actors playing Josh and Rohan, who are, themselves, both gay. But I also think it is intentional and important – gay relationships are not exotic.
I first encountered the actor who plays Josh, Brandon Flynn, in 13 Reasons Why and fell in love with him then. Yes, that way, but also because he portrays vulnerability in a way that is both real and touching. I have to admit I’d never heard of nor seen Nik Dodani, who plays Josh’s boyfriend Rohan, before, but they are instantly likable, and more importantly believable, when we first see them as a couple in the car with their dog driving to the rental house, before meeting each other’s parents. You find yourself wanting this to go well for them.
Then we stray into somewhat formulaic territory. Rohan is of Indian descent, and his parents, played by Edie Falco (from The Sopranos and Nurse Jackie) and Brian Cox (from Succession) play his rich adoptive parents who come across as snobbish and “parental but in a perfunctory sortof way.” So you know, before they even arrive, Josh’s parents are going to be the affectionate, well-meaning, but constantly miss-stepping middle-class parents. You’ll recognize Josh’s dad, Dean Norris, from Breaking Bad, but when I tell you who played his mom you’re gonna want to click over to HBO/Max right now before finishing this post and stream the movie – it’s Lisa Kudrow from Friends, and her character is exactly what you’d expect in 2025 if Phoebe Buffay from Friends married Hank Schrader from Breaking Bad and they had a gay son, whom they love and support unconditionally without even a hint of awkwardness.
My Minnesota-born mom taught me never show up as a guest in someone’s house without a casserole covered in tin foil (known as a “covered dish” if you speak Minnesota-nese), and Liddy (Lisa Kudrow as Josh’s mom) knows this rule, so she’s brought her “Crazy Noodles,” which will feature in the story later.
Lisa Kudrow is an amazing actress. While Parker Posey is also in The Parenting, playing the eccentric caretaker of the house, when she plays dingy it feels forced and I find it annoying (like in her portrayal of Victoria Ratliff in season 3 of The White Lotus). But Lisa Kudrow resurrects her iconic character, the prototypical dingbat Phoebe Buffay, and ages her by 20 years where she has a “Joe the Plumber” husband and a gay son, and it all just feels so natural. Her enthusiastic naïveté is what makes her so lovable, as Phoebe or as Liddy.
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I had about three or four paragraphs here describing some of my favorite scenes from the movie, but on the off chance that I’ve convinced you to watch it, I don’t want to spoil it for you.
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So I’ll just embed the trailer.
This film is not Shakespeare. But if you’re looking for drama, intrigue, and tragedy, may I suggest you watch the news. The Parenting is a silly film with a far-fetched demonic possession premise wrapped in a study of character contrasts, elegantly shifting from a family lamenting about the supernatural events occurring around them to a cumbersome, laborious description of Crazy Noodles. It is better at comedy than it is at horror, but it makes even the supernatural scenes laugh-out-loud funny, even when a demonically possessed Gerald (Rohan’s dad) calls his son’s boyfriend Josh “a chocolate munching poof.” Weed gummies become a major sticking point in Josh and Rohan’s relationship, despite Rohan’s out-of-touch mom seeing one and asking if it’s a multivitamin.
Maybe it is Shakespeare à la Romeo and Juliet, just updated for the 21st century. It’s a love story between star-crossed lovers, yes, but it is the WiFi password that isn’t working which literally summons the demon in a clever twist that takes the modern frustration of non-accessible Internet and gives it catastrophic, life-and-death, consequences. And I am here to tell you, having worked in IT for many years I know that look you get when you say “Internet’s down.” It is demonic!